Head spinning from visit with Oncologist

We just got home from a 3 hour appointment with the oncologist.  We saw Dr. Kamath in Batavia and she was top-notch.  After talking to the breast surgeon, I really thought I was homefree on chemo and radiation.  I knew I'd be taking tamoxifen or something similiar for 10 years.  Chemo wasn't even tossed out as an idea in all the meetings we've had with surgeons.  I knew it was a 50/50 on needing radiation and I was hoping for not needing it.

I first met with the nurse to take my vitals.  She had me remove my shoes for height and weight.  I told her I am not allowed to straighten my body out yet due to the abdominal stitches.  I told her I'm 5'9" but she wouldn't take my word.  She tried several times to measure me and got me pegged at 5'5".  I was literally rolling my eyes at the stupidity of the whole thing.  OMG.

Then the physician's assistant came in to go over the pathology report and blurt out:  The recommendation is that you need chemo.  I was not prepared to hear that.  She acted very sad for me, like she just told me I was going to die.  I was desperately trying to distract my mind from tears. (Think of one thing you can see.  Think of one thing you can hear.  Think of one thing you can smell.....get grounded!). Dave started asking her questions but she was immediately in over her head.  She left to get the oncologist.

The oncologist was excellent.  She explained the pathology report.  She was able to answer all of Dave's questions.  The thing is that I have 5 tumors that were found to be cancerous, all growing independently of each other in all quadrants of my breast.  This is very rare.  Most people have ONE tumor.  There aren't even studies done on people with so many tumors.  They recommend chemo becasue if those 5 tumors could grow independently of each other in my breast, there is no evidence to suggest that it couldn't or isn't happening all throughout my body.  Chemo would treat all of me.  It would last 6 months.  I would lose my hair and all the other side effect horrors. I would have to have a port put in my chest.  The first session would need to start 8 weeks post surgery - so in 5 more weeks.  The first appointment would  last 3-4 hours and all subsequent appointments would be about 1-2 hours long. There are formulas to determine how much life span chemo would buy me.  It doesn't buy me much vs. skipping chemo - like only 2-3% extra.  So, there's that to decide upon.  Would it be worth it?

It was a lot to take in.  She recommended that we get a second opinion.  We're talking about that now:  Cleveland, Boston, or NYC.